links..
Thursday, July 22, 2004
Okay, just for you so you don't feel neglected...
I have started going swimming as often as I can now that the weather is much better. It will be my excercise routine for the summer. That and the bike I plan to buy (second hand). Maybe I'll look like a baywatch babe yet!! lol
I watch you as you prepare for training or anything else that you set out to do and I see the determination in you to do the best job that you can. Even when we disagree, it's usually because you are trying to see things from other points of view and try to defend them, whether you agree with them or not. I see these things and I am reminded of some of the things that made me fall in love with you.
You asked me if the fact that you are self absorbed makes it difficult to be in a relationship with you. Honestly, sometimes it does but that isn't your fault. I have always lived by the motto "it's not how the other person is, it's how I am." I can't expect everyone to act as I would act in any given situation. I have much more life experience than you for starters. I have children and have had 20 years of having to be selfless (22 actually). Before that I was conditioned for this role because I lived with my grandparents and was expected to always put their needs above my own out of respect. Not that that was a problem... So I have always been able to anticipate if someone needed anything and thought nothing of providing it, be it a ride, or a meal or just attention. As far as I was concerned, it was never thought of as going out of my way or anything special. Anyway, I sometimes have to remind myself that you are not me and you won't instictivly know what I want or need. That is why I love it when you give me little things, like notes you leave (I will always keep the Marathon Man says Hello note on my desk to remind me of the time that you thought that it would make me smile - and it does everytime I look at it). I have told you before that the little things mean more to me because they simply say that the other person thought of you. Being in a relationship with you is a growing and learning experience.
I miss you... I know I see you most every day but it seems like it's been forever since I've lain in your arms and felt your breath against my neck as you sleep. Rachel has to babysit on Saturday, so maybe you could come over Saturday morning for some "one-on-one" time. I can make breakfast too if you want....
Anyway, Joanna just called and is on her way over so I have to end this for now....
1:11 PM Karen